When I decided that I wanted to go to college to study engineering, I was met with negative and discouraging comments. “You know, engineering is full of men, are you sure that’s what you want to do?” “Good luck being the only girl in your class.” “Hope you love dealing with men 24/7” were statements I constantly heard. While I knew that engineering was a male-dominated profession, I did not let those statements stop me. I thought that if I believed in myself, I would be successful.
However, when I got to college, I felt that I had to work twice as hard as my male peers just to get by. My abilities were doubted by professors and TAs, and I was spoken over and second-guessed by my peers. Even though I was told that “this is what engineering is like”, I still felt out of place. Because I was always looked at and treated negatively, I began to internalize it. Even though I deserved my place in engineering, my peers thought otherwise.
This imposter phenomenon is a common feeling. Imposter phenomenon is a psychological experience characterized by persistent feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy, despite evidence of one’s achievement. I earned my spot in engineering, but because I did not look like my peers, I felt othered. Othering did more than impact me socially. I did not feel motivated to try as hard in my classes because I knew I would not be taken seriously, and my grades decreased significantly.
However, when I began to reach out to my community of other first-year engineering students, I found out that my feelings were not isolated. Many others shared feelings similar to mine and approached my feelings with empathy. At that moment, I was thankful for the community that I had.
Once I found my community, I started to notice positive changes happening:
- I can talk with people about what I’ve been experiencing and see if they can help me navigate my feelings.
- Having others to rely on in times of need has helped me navigate through the waters.
- Finding a group of like-minded people can significantly reduce feelings of isolation and frustration.
- This one is important! I will always have the feeling of “is this right?” and questioning the things I do. By having someone to back me up, especially when they work in my field, they can help with the self-doubt I run into.
Community makes all the difference. It helps you feel seen, understood, and supported without judgment. When you choose to stay strong and fight on, you are inspiring someone else to do the same. If you are looking for ways to get connected to your peers, the College of Engineering and Applied Sciences sponsors many identity-based organizations.
Mitch (she/they) and Terryn (any pronouns)
Peer Health Educators